Hey Mitt–Here’s Your Lifeline

I’m totally mystified by this ongoing Bain Capital controversy: Did Romney enjoy firing people? Is there a Bad Vulture Capitalism as well as a Good Venture Capitalism?

Is this the Republican Presidential primary or a goddam episode of Anderson Cooper 360?

Since it seems inevitable that Mitt will be the nominee–unless my nightly cries of woe have reached sympathetic and influential ears, and Paul Ryan changes his mind–I guess it’s time to give the guy some much-needed help. Obviously his campaign staff consists of nothing but idiots. So here goes…all yours, Mitt, and absolutely free of charge:

The next time this Bain Capital bullshit comes up, just look sternly at your inquisitor, point a determined index finger, and say in firm but measured tones: “There’s only one person in America I want to fire–Barack Obama!” Then stand there stoically and let the waves of wild applause and deafening cheers wash over you.

You’re welcome.


Filed under Politics

2 responses to “Hey Mitt–Here’s Your Lifeline

  1. trooper york

    He would only do that if he could grow a pair.

    It ain’t happening.

  2. I’m afraid you’re right, Troop. You’d think a guy with 5 sons would be a lot more ballsy.

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